2009: Lost and Found

In the past few years, every year Wesley and I would spend our new year eve at the 'Year End Thanks-giving Prayer Meeting' at our church. I don't remember we have missed it since we attended SIC together. I hope it will become a family tradition in our house.

Indeed I really enjoy this meeting, and I insist to share in it every year. To me, it's really a privilege and honour to be able to give thanks and glory to our Lord in this meeting, for all the wonderful things He has done in my life and our family.

This year, I gave thanks for 2 'Lost and Found' stories.

The first story concerned myself. 2009 was the first year I returned to work 'full time', as I was away on maternity leave for 3 months each in 2007 and 2008. As I have worked in my current position for nearly 5 years already, I started to feel a bit bored with my job. So I started looking, not only for changes but also for opportunity to get promotion. Not only I looked but I also actively thought about it and planned about it and pondered on it.

Then one day when I was discussing this subject with Wesley, he asked me bluntly, 'What you're thinking, are you trying to undo what you have done few years ago, when you decided to move out from the company's trainee scheme?' 'No, of course not,' I answered quickly, and a bit hot-tempered, feeling his question was accusing in nature. With a good temper, Wesley just smiled and didn't press on.

But after I calmed down, and I tried to think thru what I have been pondering, I couldn't help but agree with Wesley, 'trying to undo what I've decided few years ago' was exactly what I was trying to do! i.e. basically to try and work very hard in planning and plotting for securing more from my job, in terms of status, money, power, fame.

I felt some cold sweat coming out from me. What was I doing? What was I thinking? I opted out few years ago as I heard God clearly at that time. I thought I have learnt my lesson and won the battle against earthly desires and early wants. How wrong I was! Such temptation actually keeps staying around and has been waiting on the side to attack us whenever we are not paying attention!

How grateful I was for my Lord to remind me and brought me back once again, before I committed myself to the wrong path. And I am most grateful for such a loving, patient, good-tempered and wise husband to give me good council and Godly advice. As said in the Bible, 'two men is better than one as they can help each other whenever one falls'.

So I was lost, for a while, but am found.

The second Lost and Found story, was about Wesley and the two kids.

Among the many family and friends I know of, I admire most how Ah Sun, a brother in our church, interact with his two daughters. I've never seen such strong father-daughter relationship. Mother-daughter/son relationship is naturally and instinctively strong. But I know that for such strong father-daughter relationship, it demanded much more consciousness and hard work from the father.

And wishing the best for Wesley, of course I hoped he could enjoy the same very intimate relationship with our kids as well.

In December, Wesley and I had decided to bring along Yee Sum and Lok Lok for a 3-day short trip to Taipei. We really wanted a break away from HK and we wanted to see if we could handle taking the two kids with us to travel. It was a long and tiring 3-day, for us both and for the kids. But it proved to be a very nice trip and very worthwhile, as Wesley became much closer to the kids even just after these 3 days.

'That's why we need to do family travel,' Wesley said, upon returning to HK. But I suggested, 'it may not be about travel but because you didn't have computer or even iPhone to surf on internet, so you could really concentrate on the kids that's what making the difference!' Wesley nodded in agreement and didn't say much more.

But since we returned from the trip, Wesley would not sit in front of the computer any more when the kids were still around, nor would he play on the iPhone. Now he would sit on the mat to play with both kids after coming back from work, and only enjoyed his facebook or blogs after they both went to sleep.

And the change in the kids' response was so obvious! Sum Sum would now prefer Papa over Mami, some time, and got much sticky with Wesley now. Lok Lok also won't cry as badly when Wesley took care of him.

Children are so direct and their hearts so pure, they notice our every little change and they also respond with their heart and their love.

I am most grateful to our Lord for opening Wesley's heart and eyes and ears, and said as in Bible, 'for Fathers to turn their hearts towards their sons and daughters'.

And the very loving, very intimate relationship between the father and daughter/son in my family that at one point I feared losing, is now again safe and found in our house.